Brrring, Brrring, Chow

So I'm looking to get a scooter; specifically, the beautiful scooter pictured. And ok, so I've never ridden a motorcycle (other than on the back) but it seems like a good idea. I've been trying to sign up for motorcycle lessons in the NoVa/DC Metro area and the classes are all full. Bummer dude. I'm hoping for a cancellation, as I have a little bit of time of my hands right now and I'd love a distraction. If anyone out there knows of a certified place in NoVA other than the Northern Virginia Community College and Apex, please let me know.

Easter Version of What Not to Put in the Microwave

The dying of Easter eggs; a wholesome traditional (though I have to say, white eggs look really strange after you've been eating brown ones for years). So we boil the water for the eggs and put them in for 10 minutes; turns out that's not long enough and it's not good to figure this out after the kids have started dying them. So we put them back in the water; the dye does come off but can be redyed. However one should not put the partially cooked eggs in the microwave; it doesn't actually cook them. Instead they just blow up. (I'm guessing others out there probably already knew this). I was in the other room and I heard my friend saying "sometimes mommy's make mistakes and then they have to clean the egg from the inside of the microwave." Some helpful links though for others attempting eggs cooking below (and does anyone else remember the infomercial for that microwave egg boiler thing; I'm remembering it was on around 2 in the morning -- ah those college days):

Microwaving
http://whatscookingamerica.net/Eggs/MicrowaveEggs.htm
Blowing the shell off a hard boiled egg
http://www.wikihow.com/Blow-the-Shell-off-a-Hard-Boiled-Egg
Microwave egg boiler
http://www.amazon.com/Nordic-Ware-64802-NordicWare-Boiler/dp/B0007M2BN0/ref=pd_lpo_k2_dp_k2a_3_txt/002-2308242-4254441

My New Blog Link

Got married a few weeks ago to http://www.mrnull.lab-24.com/index.php and we thought it would be too adorkable to have matching blog sites. Yep, it a bit disgusting but we's in love. My new blog can be found at: http://mrsnull.lab-24.com/. Please come visit!

The Power of Forwards and Lottery Tickets

We all have those friends who seem slightly addicted to 'forwarding' every silly poem, slidescreen (of animals doing something) and .wav file (again, usually of animals doing something). I have a friend whose parental units believe it is irresponsible not to forward certain 'warnings' especially the one about gang member initiations (the gang member 'to-be' drives around without their car lights on and then kills you if you flash your lights at them). Course these same parental units believe that it is your civil duty to purchase lottery tickets when the pot gets about $80 million. (Can't disagree with that).

Generally I do not engage in 'forwarding.' Hence, Lord knows how many times I've damned myself to seven (or more) years of bad luck by breaking the chain. But I don't mind being the receiver of the forward; please don't view this statement as an open invitation to start mailing me random amounts of crap. I'm saying that I appreciate the ones I already receive. It's awfully nice to receive an email that says 'Happy Friday' or 'Do you know how special you are?' regardless of the cheese contained within. Good karma. I thank you 'forwarders' for brightening my day!

Carpe Diem...

It's that season again...

Wedding season is upon us again. A season where as a guest you start wondering what should I get the happly couple. Thankfully the couple usually provides a list of items they would like to have; hence, making gift giving easier. Had lunch with a good friend of mine this week who informed me about a wedding registry that lists, as one of the 'we'd love to have' items, a crowbar. Yes, a black metal 'S' shaped crowbar.

A few questions quickly appeared in my head:

1. Really, you need a crowbar that much? Why? The occasional 'moved into a new house - have to force open rusty metal doorlock' - maybe; otherwise, slightly suspect.

2. How does one, as a guest, give the gift of a crowbar? Wrap it in a big bow and say 'here you go, please think of me everytime you beat your poodle with this gift.'

[Complete sidenote - me - big fan of scraping the registry and getting the happy couple a goat, a la, http://www.heifer.org or paying for a few cats to be neutered in their honor http://www.alleycat.org/]

Tasty

The House of Representatives, Energy and Commerce Committee, Environment and Hazardous Materials subcommittee is holding a hearing entitled: Antifreeze Bittering Agent.

CQ reports the following agenda:

A subcommittee hearing on H.R. 2567, a bill to amend the Federal Hazardous Substances Act to require engine coolant and antifreeze to contain a bittering agent so as to render it unpalatable.

Do we really think people consume engine coolant and/or antifreeze because it tastes good? Is the problem that it's palatable? Yum -I'm thinking salad dressing. Really, 60,000 pets and 4,000 children can't be wrong.

Seriously though, many pets and children die from drinking antifreeze each year. Apparently the argument for this bill goes alongs the lines of: if one accidently ingests said substances that they won't drink any more once the bitter taste kicks in. I'm thinking lock up the antifreeze and the engine coolant so the pets and the kids don't get it in the first place.

Boys, boys, boys, I'm looking for a good time...

"You know, like nunchuck skills, bowhunting skills, computer hacking skills... Girls only want boyfriends who have great skills." [And who aren't allergic to cats].

There Is No Matrix

Right, so recently, my work computer was upgraded (thanks IT guys) but now the default screen saver is the Matrix (the default songs on media player also include Poison's 'Every Rose Has It's Thorn' along with Motley Crue's 'Girls, Girls, Girls' but more on the questionable song choices later). I'm sure someone thought this Matrix plan was a good one, but I do not understand? I thought the Matrix was ridiculous. Keanu Reeves is not 'the one.' In fact, during the Matrix (part I) when Morpheaus declares him to be 'the one' I literally laughed out loud in the movie theater and then didn't understand why no one else was laughing. Oh and the 'there is no spoon' metaphor; come on people - no reality - as if that's an original thought. The second one was all about running around in dirty clothes and the orgy dance scene. The third - ok, I admit it, I couldn't/didn't watch the third. But here's my issue, I have many friends (mostly in the computer science field) who believe these movies are good and 'really made them think.' Huh, what? The themes portrayed throughout the three movies are a mixture of major religious doctrines with a little Hollywood splash. And for the record, I'm not saying the special effects weren't cool; they were. It's the mass appeal of the so-called 'plot' I don't understand. Can someone please explain?!

Don't Read Much; Hurts My Brain Part I

About a month and a half ago, I was dinking around 'in a seaside town they forgot to close down' in the southwest of England known as Poole. Walking around, checking out the town but it's March in England which means it's freezing cold. I head over to the Poole Museum (get me a little culture and some warmth) but the Museum was closed. Then what to my freezing eyes did appear, but a sign saying I could go around to the back entrance (shut it, i.e., no comments about the use of 'back entrance' people). I go inside and it's the Poole Museum library; a lovely library with a librarian who takes one look at me and says 'Here you go, love, we'll set you up with some books with pictures that you can look at.' She continues, 'There are loads of really nice pictures in here of Poole.' Thankfully, there were not many words in the books to confuse me (or to explain what the pictures meant), but I learned all about (ok saw) Poole through the ages -- The entire time silently giggling to myself and wondering if I look like a ninny or if she was like this with all library patrons.

Cake and Naked Dolls

So for a friend's 30th birthday, I made her 'Naked Man Jumping Out of Cake' (by made, I mean, I adapted a Ken doll to look like a mutual friend complete with tattoos, anatomically correct parts and glued on a cut-out picture). Aside - why is Ken 'all build, no package'?; Barbie has boobies at least. The cake portion involved much glitter and fingerpaints.

A good time was had by all (damaging of the pee pee did occur but was remedied via toothpick). Starting to wonder if I should go with a different money-making scheme on the island.